Happy Birthday to Me - Celebrating Life’s Spectrum at Every Age

So, I am 52 years old now, and as I reflect, I vividly recall turning 40 and hearing/believing/feeling that it seemed to only get "better and better."

It wasn’t an overnight change—it was the result of lived experiences, maturity, and grounding in values that I’ve gradually cultivated over time. The seeds I had planted and nurtured were beginning to bloom. And now, at 52, it feels like I’ve stepped into an even higher vibration of that realization.

I often find myself thinking, "How fortunate am I?" But let me be honest—this sense of ease and joy hasn’t come quickly or without focused attention and effort. It has been a journey shaped by therapy, community, unlearning dysfunctional patterns, learning healthier ones, and doing the deep work of understanding myself. This peace I now feel is unfamiliar and new, the result of many years of struggle and healing.

And because of that, I know this is possible for others, too. Not on anyone else’s timeline, but their own. Our individual times, situations, struggles, and joys are unique. They don’t land in the same way or at the same time. That’s why gentle compassion, trust in ourselves, and the ability to discern that someone else’s joy doesn’t diminish our struggles—or our worth—are so important.

For so many years, others made my birthday feel special. They went out of their way to celebrate me, wanting me to feel as special as they saw me. And yet, I always struggled to connect with that. Yesterday, for the very first time, it felt natural. To simply be. To hold ease and joy without effort. And it was delightful!

It felt as though I was seeing life through fresh lenses—ones that revealed something vibrant and exciting. Not through having, receiving, or expecting anything external, but through an internal bloom—a gorgeous new flower that had been dormant, quietly waiting for its moment. Just looking at it, appreciating it, felt like turning up the light and color on my life.

I have so much to be grateful for. I always have. But this year, I am especially excited to walk through the full spectrum of life—ordinary and extraordinary, hard and soft, pain and pleasure, failure and success—with a renewed sense of vision and sensation.

If this resonates with you, know this: joy and peace are possible for you, too. And wherever you are right now—whether in struggle or in celebration—it is valid. Your journey matters, just as it is.

Happy Birthday to my ‘Not Happy Birthday’ past